Locked?? post oh yeaaahh

[remarch]

Who: March and the adventures of Bakanary
When: Day 37, Evening


[March is quite fond of the fourth level, with its strange ideas about fresh air and actual sky, which is why he's easily found sitting down on the rusted walk, slightly away from the portraits of the fourth level teams. Just follow the bob of red hair, or the shrill sound of someone idly scraping into the metal with a knife.

Where he definitely isn't considering the best way to eviscerate another team no siree.]

Comments

[asthecrowdies]

Uhhh. What the hell do you get out of telling him.

[remarch]

"If you hurt me, I hurt King." He's trying to protect the team, isn't he?

[asthecrowdies]

Oh yeah.

How about you only tell him if he tries anything worse than a punch?

Really no reason to start another fucking round of feelings sharing over a black eye or two.

[remarch]

If he hits me, I'll stab him.

[A slight hint of frustration at their lack of communication, forcing himself to speak up again.]

It's reflex.

[asthecrowdies]

...Christ. I'm telling you dude. We should really work on that. I'll help you out but you're gonna have no end of shit if every time a dumbass gets a little emotional and throws a punch you try to kill him.

But ok. I'll talk to him.

[remarch]

There, that was just as pointlessly difficult as all my conversations with your shade of yellow, isn't it great to accomplish things?

[Siiitting back down.]

[asthecrowdies]

Man I dunno about you but I find these little chats really life affirming. Good to know I still have value meatshielding attacks for my dumbshit teammates.

[pauses then floats to sit down next to]

So. Other than not killing everyone, what's up with you. Not sure if you've noticed but you're kinda fucked up.

[remarch]

[Tenses, forcing himself not to edge away from the presence. He's in control, he can handle this.]

I got my ass kicked by one of the rat-things, I was slaughtering babies and someone beat me for it, make up your own adventure. Don't you have a Rabbit to be talking out of suicide-by-knife?

[asthecrowdies]

[notices the tense and edges away a bit for you]

Don't really have to worry about him when you're here. But yeah tell me one more thing and I'll fuck off. What's with the dragon feeding. Are you seriously doing that? Is he doing your dentil work for it?

[remarch]

We're feeding him animals, not people, and the teeth don't need any more work now I have a matching set.

[asthecrowdies]

So what are you getting out of it?

[remarch]

Protection, what else? Dragon likes minions a lot more than people like Celeste's.

[asthecrowdies]

Yeah I'm sure that shits never gonna backfire. Is he gonna eat all the enemies that only exist in your paranoid delusions or just dudes that actually attack you?

[remarch]

It might depend on what sauce we have.

[asthecrowdies]

Oh my god.

[facepalm


...takes his other hand off his ear where the bleeding has stopped, rubs the dried blood off on the ground]

We are seriously going to make this place even shittier than it already is.

[remarch]

We're ruining the homely atmosphere?

[asthecrowdies]

The really fucking messed up thing is I'm kinda getting used to it and like. Thinking maybe it's not so bad here. Maybe just because I'm not drunk all the time anymore or none of my teammates have disappeared in like a week and you actually haven't stabbed anyone in like what. Two weeks? Shit is doing ok.

[remarch]

I could try setting it on fire, or talking Hathy into cutting, if what you need is a bit of total fucking misery to be comfortable and hateful? Graffiti puppet porn on the walls and give duchess dating advice? Exist near Kitty? I offer plenty of free services.

[asthecrowdies]

Been on fucking fire, Hathy sort of cuts himself on you, my bro is into puppets in a god damned sincere way that I don't wanna talk about ever, I don't think you could actually make shit with Duch any weirder and fuck you, Chesh is ok.

But what I was trying to say is that actually I kind of like how shit's been going, not that I need to practice my masochism by watching you make it even worse again.

[remarch]

You offered a knife-wielding psycho an IOU on mad torture because your role in non-life is meatshielding, you're either a masochist or need 99 boosts to your self-esteem stat. So I guessed wrong!

[asthecrowdies]

Hey. Nothing wrong with being a meatshield. Someone's gotta do it. It's respectable goddamn work. As far as you know I come from a long feathery line of meatshields.

[remarch]

Hatched from a heroic pigeon?

[asthecrowdies]

Jesus christ I'm a crow and that shit you just said is fucking racist.

[remarch]

Pigeons aren't a race, they're a species.

[asthecrowdies]

Race of a species. Speciesest and racist in like one sentence.

My god.

You really have no fucking shame.