Locked?? post oh yeaaahh

[remarch]

Who: March and the adventures of Bakanary
When: Day 37, Evening


[March is quite fond of the fourth level, with its strange ideas about fresh air and actual sky, which is why he's easily found sitting down on the rusted walk, slightly away from the portraits of the fourth level teams. Just follow the bob of red hair, or the shrill sound of someone idly scraping into the metal with a knife.

Where he definitely isn't considering the best way to eviscerate another team no siree.]

Comments

[remarch]

I got the heads up, didn't you? Was I meant to sit around and wait for you to finish setting up? Did Canary need more time to warm up?

[He keeps smiling, bright and utterly manic, and his gaze is fixed on King- That wasn't a warning shot, and he's biding his time for an opening.]

Or are Duchess and Kitty still out in the halls for after I'm done with you? You're not very good at organizing, are you?

[asthecrowdies]

Uh. What the fuck? Look I appreciate your awareness of my vast intellect. I am basically the sharpest bird you'll ever meet. I can peck up to ten and calculate the precise trajectory needed to shit on you from fifty feet up. But I'm not actually god damned psychic, ok?

[remarch]

Smaller words? How about:

"Canary. Is. Going. To. Die."

Does that work?

[asthecrowdies]

Yeah I kinda guessed that's what you were after. It was really obvious what the ballistic paranoid frenzy where we don't have better shit to do than wait around the halls to shank you. What the fuck happened??

[remarch]

What else? You're going to be the poor innocent victims, just like you always wanted. I'm taking the bait, because I really have better things to do with my time then wait for you all to hunt me down and make me 'regret it'.

[asthecrowdies]

Dude no one is hunting you down. Like seriously what part of this shit looks like hunting to you? I'm not even wearing my lucky hoodie of unrepentant slaughter. Christ it must be amazing to live in a universe where everything revolves around trying to kill you.

[remarch]

[Giving him this look of

seriously?

seriously?]

Can you all start talking to each other so I don't have to itemize my murdering?

[asthecrowdies]

Shut your face we already talk about your crazy ass too much already. I'm getting ulcers like artery clogging gold nuggets thanks to you and this is how you repay me.

Now what the shit happened?

[remarch]

Your Rabbit declared war on Celeste.

Apparently I'm meant to start regretting my psycho existence now- But why should I do that when I can just make it so there's less people to complain, right?

[asthecrowdies]

Oh my god. This is why you two aren't supposed to fucking be talking to each other. Rabbit's idea of declaring war, even if he wanted to, which he wouldn't, cuz he's stupid not crazy, would be force feeding you knuckle sandwiches and steely staring contests by the lockers. And you're a fucking dumbass for not bent able to figure this shit out.

[remarch]

Funny, the last time I took a reassurance from one of you- Well, listened to, you're not all exactly unpredictable, are you?- it was that Duchess would be keeping him from causing me harm and taking care of the issue, and next thing I know, a few hours later he's having a little chat to me.

Do you really think I'm going to keep nodding to these waste of time lies?

[asthecrowdies]

Yeah cuz we aren't exactly all on the same page here. I dunno why you think a bunch of total strangers tossed together and stripped of their memories are all gonna want to do the same thing? I mean I fucking know Celeste ain't that way, though it looks like you've lost or chased off the ones that aren't down with threats of eviseration. So uh. Good job I guess?

Look. Rabbit wants you to fuck off, and yeah he wants you to know he's not scared of you and he'll protect his team. It ain't complicated. It doesn't mean we all got together and decided it was time to bag ourselves a March trophy to hang over the staircase.

[remarch]

[Double speed, and some of the hoarseness of his injured throat is leaking in now with his raw aggression:]

How can I fuck off if none of you leave me alone, and then I get the blame for it? Didn't I offer that? Didn't you ignore it? If you want a fight, I'll give you all one you'll regret, but I'm not playing this stupid fucking waiting game so you get excuses because I had a conversation with someone, and you don't approve of my existence. Or did you all expect me to just jump off the roof?

[asthecrowdies]

If I wanted a fight don't think we'd have done that by now? Shit dude, I really haven't been short on opportunities here. You've drawn rich birdie blood twice.

[remarch]

Fine, you can perch in the corner.

[While I go kill like half your team okay

this is a legit offer.]

[asthecrowdies]

Jesus fuck. Do you seriously want to do this over some bullshit thing Rabbit said? Dude I'm telling you, he has o fucking clue what you're about. He's the dude who never wants to attack anyone in games. He's basically the least fucked up guy on the team. He wants to give you a black eye, not a gut wound.

[remarch]

[The slightest twitch on 'gut wound'.]

So his idea of war is punching people in the face? Really?

[asthecrowdies]

Yes?? Like. Probably a lot of face punching. But he can't stomach killing people in games to save his own fucking life. I don't think he could bring himself to kill in cold blood personally period. Look dude. I'm sorry you grew up in a murder hell hole or something. But some people's biggest worries were not popping a stiffy when talking to a hot cheer leader.

[remarch]

[I have no idea what the fuck that is.]

If he keeps threatening me, I'm going to show him that I can kill in cold blood personally, and repeatedly, and with his organs nailed to a wall.

[asthecrowdies]

I'll tell him to cut it out. I've kind tried already but basically no one listens to me.

You're never exactly short in the threats either though, dude. Like. How many times would we have killed each other if I listened to even half the shit you spew? Rabbit may be a dumbass but he knows a murderhappy dbag who keeps threatening his team when he sees one.

[remarch]

Alright, the next time Duchess tries non-conning a victory out of me when I'm minding my own business, I'll stab her instead of warning her. That sounds fair to me, too.

[asthecrowdies]

Oh my god dude this is what I mean. Use your fists. You don't actually fucking want to do this, do you?

[remarch]

[YES, I DO. I CLEARLY DO. DEFINITELY. I DIDN'T EVEN LET RABBIT WALK AWAY AFTER THREATE-

wait fuck.]

I'm a knife fighter, I use knives. It's not my fault most of you are too flimsy to take a few stabs.

[asthecrowdies]

No you're a fight to kill-er. Look I'm a sword guy, I get it. But if you don't actually wanna spend the rest of forever worrying about every orange blur in the corner of your eye, maybe we need to work on how you deal with shit without trying to kill anyone.

[remarch]

[Ssstarts laughing. Mad cackling, maybe.

Yes, that's worked out so well for him in the past.]